Week 6: Pee Pee Pee and more freaking PEE!!!!!!!
Week 6 is all about pee...I will give you a quick rundown of the week but the most important part is how to track down the culprit who is peeing all over the freaking bathrooms. And since it is so freaking hot here within only a few hours the whole place smells like a boys urinal.
But first our week...
More CNY festivities. Mike was off of work on Monday so we got to take and pick up the boys from school. We also got to spend the day together which is always a mixed bag. We picked up the meat from the buther for our first BBQ in Singapore. Lets just say it won't be happening very often. We needed more coals probably and we had enough food for 12 people and there was only the 4 of us. It took forever to cook it because Mike only had a small area with heat so it was chicken first, then skewers (which a few ended up still being raw/under cooked), then sausages, then 4 burgers and the remaining burgers had to be cooked in the kitchen. Very complicated...we need to be more prepared next time for sure. Tuesday and Wednsday were pretty normal with all the regular running around.
I got a few pictures of Shauns art work from school which was pretty nice and I had to get Lino a new school bag because his has been ripping for almost 2 weeks and I know it won't last long. I should have went to a kids shop but I just got one at the store where I was at and it was too big...it was for an adult of course. But Lino liked it. Oh, I went up to have lunch with the boys on Wednesday. Shaun has been getting complaints from his teacher that he refuses to eat lunch so I said I would go and see what it was all about. He was refusing all right and after I made him try it and he said it was good then he finally ate it. I can't come up every day so I need to find a way to get him to eat...you can't really make them eat can you???
I'll figure something out. Anyway, after him I went to check on Lino and his friends and the little girl who is always around him was telling on him big time. She was saying how bad he is and how he only is good when I am around. I asked her to try and look out for him but she shook her head saying it was to hard. I asked if he was the only one being bad and he wasn't so that was good.
Thursday I was doing some shopping for the ingredients Mike needed to make a lasagna for the party this weekend. It is a SIS event called Real Men Cook and Divas Drink. Should be fun but it was not easy looking for these ingredients...and not cheap. I could not believe that 5lbs of ground beef would be almost $50!!!! That is just unheard of. Ground beef is so cheap in the states and in Ireland it is still hard to swallow. We have to find a substitute and quick...anyway on my way out from the mall I saw a cool Dragon show in the mall...I recorded 18 minutes of it on my phone. I was so impressed that I had that much storage to record that long! And I was impressed that I held up my arms for that long recording it...it was pretty interesting. Shaun had his first basketball practice today too. It isn't very fancy, just some guy who plays basketball with the kids at the court of the condo...Shaun was half into it and half not interested. Lets see how it goes.
He did make a basket which was pretty awesome! Friday we started watching Game of Thrones (finally) and it was good...I can't wait to see how it turns out...I know we are like 6 mo behind but we had a lot going on. Saturday was a busy morning...Shaun had his first soccer practice and Lino had swimming...both at the school. Shaun was excited at the beginning but not even half way through he was sitting down and completely not listening to the coach. Lino on the other hand was pretty good and I think he is improving already and it has only been 3 classes.
There was a festival at the condo that I was trying to go to but we were in no hurry after practice and didn't make it back in time...I hear it was nice. So when we got back Mike got to cooking his dish and had to make a lot of adjustments because we didn't have all the ingredients, he didn't tell me all the right ingredients to get and it was just a stressful activity so we had to open a bottle of wine in order to try and calm ourselves down. The boys were off with their friends riding bikes so they had no idea that we were nearly going to kill each other. The event was pretty fun, we got there kind of early for my normal standards because I wasn't sure how it was going to go but I should have known black folks be late all the time so there was no need to hurry. I think we all had a good time and we stayed pretty late so that must mean we had a good time. Apparently the dishes were to be judged by the guest and voted on so Mike was not happy that I made him adjust his recipe so much because his lasagna didn't turn out the way he wanted it to. They also did a black history trivia match and a spades tournament. I tried to get Mike to play spades but he was being really shy so I played instead. I am not the best spades player in my family but normally when Mike & I play together we do pretty well...today I did OK. My partner was pretty good so he saved my ass a few times. Unfortunately we were out in the first round but we gave the other team hell. So much fun!!!!
An now to the pee. So it is no secret that I have 2 boys. And it is no secret that in general, boys are nasty creatures...I would know because I married one! But my boys some days really take the general statement that boys are nasty creatures to a whole new level. My boys like to make nasty seem clean. They find ways to just gross me and every one around them out. And I don't even think they are trying...I can't imagine what it would be like if they actually tried. The same is true for the other side of the coin. If they would only just try a little to not be so nasty it would make a world of difference....but I am convinced that they do not even try to not be nasty and as a result the nastyness just is everywhere. And I mean everywhere!!!! So for the past week or so I have been smelling pee every where I go in the house. I thought that maybe I didn't mop the floors good or maybe the boys put some old underwear back into the drawers or cabinets or something...what ever it was I couldn't find it. I mean I found pee on the toilets like normal and I had the boys clean it up like always but I could never get rid of the freaking lingering pee smell. One day I had enough and I was like a hound dog on a mission to find the freaking pee. I knew it must be in their room so I was sniffing around and the whole room smelled almost the same except the bathroom. And this is my fault, because normally I just look at the toilet and I see the pee on the seat and I have the clean it up...this time I actually LOOKED at the toilet and saw just beyond the toilet a see of pee. Not just by the toilet, there was pee there too, but beyond it...in the shower beyond it! There was a puddle of what looked like almost dry pee. Not a little pee, like a drip but like a pond gone dry amount of pee...in the shower!!!!! Now some might think that I should have caught that a while ago I mean how could you miss that when you clean the bathroom. This is true...the truth of the matter is that I don't normally clean their shower because they don't use it. So it only gets my attention very once in a while when I spray it down and I had just done that a little over a week ago...just before the pee aroma started to catch my nose. So it is hard to tell how long that pee was there but I am guessing it was there for a week. And maybe it was from one incident or maybe several I don't know but I tell you I was not happy about it! Thankfully the boys were gone to school because I am sure I would have killed them! I mean seriously...and I had a good feeling I knew who it was but didn't want to jump to conclusions just yet...I needed to collect a little more data before I kill the wrong heir. So I proceed to clean up this pee and nearly die from ammonium fumes because I had boiled a bunch of hot water to make sure to get it clean and there is no windows in the bathroom so the hot water and the dry crusted on dehydrated pond of piss just became a weapon of mom destruction in a matter of seconds. It took me a good hour to clean that small bathroom and even after 6 gallons of boiling water and soap and even me hosing the place down...oh this is one of the most amazing things about the bathrooms in Singapore...they are all designed to be hosed down...there is a drain in the floor so if you literally want to turn on a hose and go to town in the bathroom you could and you wouldn't have to worry about getting a shop vac to suck up all the water...down the drain it goes. Oh man this is one of those things that you don't know you need until you have it then now you can't un-need it...I need this in my life for every...at least until the boys know how to not just go to the toilet but to actually pee into the toilet and not just pee in the direction of the toilet but actually get all of the pee into the toilet...one day...one day...right????? sorry I digress...so 6 gallons of boiling water and about 5 minutes of just pure water hosing down the toilet the sides and the bathroom and it still smelled like piss!!!! What the fuck!!!!! I thought that maybe it was just int he air or in my nose at that point so decided to give it a break and mop up a little of the water so that it would dry quicker. Later that day the smell was a lot better but not gone. A few days later the smell was back and I knew where to look and yup someone peed all over the freaking toilet and shower again. Now let me explain this shower portion of this story...the way the bathroom is set up is the door opens into the bathroom and stops right in front of the toilet. So the way the boys usually go to the toilet (I've discovered after my investigation) is by going pee on the side of the toilet. Now this wouldn't be so bad because they are peeing into the toilet but the problem is that the culprit, Shaun, waits so long to go pee and has now picked up the habit from his brother to only pull his little penis out and peeing like that. Well Shaun is not able to pull of this little nasty lazy trick as well as his brother and in the process of only pulling this small little penis out of his pants as he is dancing around trying to hold the pee back...pee starts coming out and goes everywhere. And because he is on the side of the toilet and not in front of it he has even less room for error as the trajectory of this pee goes up and over the toilet first before being redirected into the bowl. This process while quick is not quick enough because the bulk of his pee must come out at the start of the process because the time that I witnessed this...this...catastrophe I couldn't understand how so much pee could go to the other side of the toilet so fast when he was pretty good about correcting his over shot. I still don't know but at least I know the most important things...well kind of...who: Shaun, and how: lazy nasty discussing boys trying to pee as quick as possible leaving no time to actually pee properly into the toilet. The other important question that I will never know the answer to is of course WHY????? So after I see what the problem is I try to tell him to change the way he is peeing and I show him all the pee on the other side of the toilet and how he needs to pee in front of the toilet instead of the side so that the pee actually goes into the toilet. He is half way listening, which is not enough but what I expected. So I make him get them and clean up the pee. I am trying to teach them to think about their actions because there are always consequences...this is his. Of course Shaun only sees it as punishment and just cries for the 5 minutes that I had him 'mopping' the floor. I am hoping that this will at least make him start to pay more attention in the future. There is only so much I can do and if I could change the way the door opens so that it is easier for him to stand in front of the toilet I would. Who designs a bathroom like that anyway...that is the really stupid part. On top of that, just next to the toilet, parallel to it, is the shower. There is no tub so only a sliding door. So my theory is that when the first portion of Shauns pee trajectory goes over to the shower and hits the sliding shower door and goes down to the rolling grove at the bottom and the pee goes into the shower from there. It is hard to explain but basically the pee is running off of the shower door down to the groove and going into the shower....gross. So Shaun does his mopping and I mop it again later because you know he was just moving pee around not really cleaning. Then another couple days later and the pee is back. I've had it up to my eyeballs with the freaking pee now. I had to send daddy in to manage the pee clean-up this time because I was seriously going to kill them. I knew it was both this time because there was pee on the main seat which is all Lino (to lazy to lift the damn lid) and pee on the floor so I gave Lino the wipe and Shaun the mop. Lino thought that Shaun was getting off easy so he fussed and fussed for the mop and finally I gave it to him. He wasn't happy when he saw what needed to be cleaned and he quickly turned his tune from I want to mop to "why do I have to mop?" Oh Lino, be careful what you wish for. Anyway, Mike supervised and I had to come back and supervise him...its like the big kid managing the small kid....at some point the adult has to check in to make sure they are actually doing what they are suppose to be doing. So of course it still smelled like pee and Mike said he would take care of it...he did. But when I came back again I was not convinced that the pee was gone. I went on another hunt and this time found piss in the trash can!!!! Damnit to hell...what the fuck is seriously going on. There is piss everywhere in the fucking bathroom. I can't even figure out how the hell the piss got into the trash can in the first place but after I picked it up I knew that was the true source. The fucking nasty trash can. They never even throw trash away so why do I have it in there??? I guess to catch the extra piss that the shower can't take???? What is would it be needed for? So that thing almost got tossed into the trash but living in an apartment the trash bin in in the basement and the trash can in their room was too big to go down the shoot...so I made Mike clean it! hahaha Then I went to town again with the water hose...I think I just like the fact that I can hose down the whole bathroom...it kind of makes me feel powerful in a way that I never thought possible. The moral of this whole story is that it took me a week to find the real source of the pee fumes and once I did the smell was gone thank god...well that was until the next time the little terror strikes again. Which unfortunately is about 2-3x a week. I never ever thought in my life that I would be hunting down pee...never. I am thankful that there are no carpets in this place so it is easy enough to clean up. If there was even the smallest bit of carpet here we would be in big trouble. With the heat and humidity here if they even dribbled a little pee on the carpet it would make the whole place smell for a very long time and it would be almost impossible to find the source...so for that I am thankful. But that is about it...oh and the hose...did I say how much I love this drain in the bathroom...just amazing. I can not wait to tell this story to Shaun's future wife or girlfriend because someone is going to have to worn these women that these boys are filthy nasty little creatures and if they are interested in procreating with them they need to be prepared for the nasty of the nastiest things...things you can't even imagine because that is exactly what I am dealing with now. I pray that they grow out of it because this is just gross and it makes me look bad as a mother! Like I tolerate this...believe me I do not!!!! My sister sure thinks I'm funny because as I am telling her this story she sounds like she is having a asthma attack because she is gasping for air in the middle of her laughs. I assure you this is no laughing matter...this is serious piss!!!!
But first our week...
I got a few pictures of Shauns art work from school which was pretty nice and I had to get Lino a new school bag because his has been ripping for almost 2 weeks and I know it won't last long. I should have went to a kids shop but I just got one at the store where I was at and it was too big...it was for an adult of course. But Lino liked it. Oh, I went up to have lunch with the boys on Wednesday. Shaun has been getting complaints from his teacher that he refuses to eat lunch so I said I would go and see what it was all about. He was refusing all right and after I made him try it and he said it was good then he finally ate it. I can't come up every day so I need to find a way to get him to eat...you can't really make them eat can you??? 
Thursday I was doing some shopping for the ingredients Mike needed to make a lasagna for the party this weekend. It is a SIS event called Real Men Cook and Divas Drink. Should be fun but it was not easy looking for these ingredients...and not cheap. I could not believe that 5lbs of ground beef would be almost $50!!!! That is just unheard of. Ground beef is so cheap in the states and in Ireland it is still hard to swallow. We have to find a substitute and quick...anyway on my way out from the mall I saw a cool Dragon show in the mall...I recorded 18 minutes of it on my phone. I was so impressed that I had that much storage to record that long! And I was impressed that I held up my arms for that long recording it...it was pretty interesting. Shaun had his first basketball practice today too. It isn't very fancy, just some guy who plays basketball with the kids at the court of the condo...Shaun was half into it and half not interested. Lets see how it goes. 
There was a festival at the condo that I was trying to go to but we were in no hurry after practice and didn't make it back in time...I hear it was nice. So when we got back Mike got to cooking his dish and had to make a lot of adjustments because we didn't have all the ingredients, he didn't tell me all the right ingredients to get and it was just a stressful activity so we had to open a bottle of wine in order to try and calm ourselves down. The boys were off with their friends riding bikes so they had no idea that we were nearly going to kill each other. The event was pretty fun, we got there kind of early for my normal standards because I wasn't sure how it was going to go but I should have known black folks be late all the time so there was no need to hurry. I think we all had a good time and we stayed pretty late so that must mean we had a good time. Apparently the dishes were to be judged by the guest and voted on so Mike was not happy that I made him adjust his recipe so much because his lasagna didn't turn out the way he wanted it to. They also did a black history trivia match and a spades tournament. I tried to get Mike to play spades but he was being really shy so I played instead. I am not the best spades player in my family but normally when Mike & I play together we do pretty well...today I did OK. My partner was pretty good so he saved my ass a few times. Unfortunately we were out in the first round but we gave the other team hell. So much fun!!!!An now to the pee. So it is no secret that I have 2 boys. And it is no secret that in general, boys are nasty creatures...I would know because I married one! But my boys some days really take the general statement that boys are nasty creatures to a whole new level. My boys like to make nasty seem clean. They find ways to just gross me and every one around them out. And I don't even think they are trying...I can't imagine what it would be like if they actually tried. The same is true for the other side of the coin. If they would only just try a little to not be so nasty it would make a world of difference....but I am convinced that they do not even try to not be nasty and as a result the nastyness just is everywhere. And I mean everywhere!!!! So for the past week or so I have been smelling pee every where I go in the house. I thought that maybe I didn't mop the floors good or maybe the boys put some old underwear back into the drawers or cabinets or something...what ever it was I couldn't find it. I mean I found pee on the toilets like normal and I had the boys clean it up like always but I could never get rid of the freaking lingering pee smell. One day I had enough and I was like a hound dog on a mission to find the freaking pee. I knew it must be in their room so I was sniffing around and the whole room smelled almost the same except the bathroom. And this is my fault, because normally I just look at the toilet and I see the pee on the seat and I have the clean it up...this time I actually LOOKED at the toilet and saw just beyond the toilet a see of pee. Not just by the toilet, there was pee there too, but beyond it...in the shower beyond it! There was a puddle of what looked like almost dry pee. Not a little pee, like a drip but like a pond gone dry amount of pee...in the shower!!!!! Now some might think that I should have caught that a while ago I mean how could you miss that when you clean the bathroom. This is true...the truth of the matter is that I don't normally clean their shower because they don't use it. So it only gets my attention very once in a while when I spray it down and I had just done that a little over a week ago...just before the pee aroma started to catch my nose. So it is hard to tell how long that pee was there but I am guessing it was there for a week. And maybe it was from one incident or maybe several I don't know but I tell you I was not happy about it! Thankfully the boys were gone to school because I am sure I would have killed them! I mean seriously...and I had a good feeling I knew who it was but didn't want to jump to conclusions just yet...I needed to collect a little more data before I kill the wrong heir. So I proceed to clean up this pee and nearly die from ammonium fumes because I had boiled a bunch of hot water to make sure to get it clean and there is no windows in the bathroom so the hot water and the dry crusted on dehydrated pond of piss just became a weapon of mom destruction in a matter of seconds. It took me a good hour to clean that small bathroom and even after 6 gallons of boiling water and soap and even me hosing the place down...oh this is one of the most amazing things about the bathrooms in Singapore...they are all designed to be hosed down...there is a drain in the floor so if you literally want to turn on a hose and go to town in the bathroom you could and you wouldn't have to worry about getting a shop vac to suck up all the water...down the drain it goes. Oh man this is one of those things that you don't know you need until you have it then now you can't un-need it...I need this in my life for every...at least until the boys know how to not just go to the toilet but to actually pee into the toilet and not just pee in the direction of the toilet but actually get all of the pee into the toilet...one day...one day...right????? sorry I digress...so 6 gallons of boiling water and about 5 minutes of just pure water hosing down the toilet the sides and the bathroom and it still smelled like piss!!!! What the fuck!!!!! I thought that maybe it was just int he air or in my nose at that point so decided to give it a break and mop up a little of the water so that it would dry quicker. Later that day the smell was a lot better but not gone. A few days later the smell was back and I knew where to look and yup someone peed all over the freaking toilet and shower again. Now let me explain this shower portion of this story...the way the bathroom is set up is the door opens into the bathroom and stops right in front of the toilet. So the way the boys usually go to the toilet (I've discovered after my investigation) is by going pee on the side of the toilet. Now this wouldn't be so bad because they are peeing into the toilet but the problem is that the culprit, Shaun, waits so long to go pee and has now picked up the habit from his brother to only pull his little penis out and peeing like that. Well Shaun is not able to pull of this little nasty lazy trick as well as his brother and in the process of only pulling this small little penis out of his pants as he is dancing around trying to hold the pee back...pee starts coming out and goes everywhere. And because he is on the side of the toilet and not in front of it he has even less room for error as the trajectory of this pee goes up and over the toilet first before being redirected into the bowl. This process while quick is not quick enough because the bulk of his pee must come out at the start of the process because the time that I witnessed this...this...catastrophe I couldn't understand how so much pee could go to the other side of the toilet so fast when he was pretty good about correcting his over shot. I still don't know but at least I know the most important things...well kind of...who: Shaun, and how: lazy nasty discussing boys trying to pee as quick as possible leaving no time to actually pee properly into the toilet. The other important question that I will never know the answer to is of course WHY????? So after I see what the problem is I try to tell him to change the way he is peeing and I show him all the pee on the other side of the toilet and how he needs to pee in front of the toilet instead of the side so that the pee actually goes into the toilet. He is half way listening, which is not enough but what I expected. So I make him get them and clean up the pee. I am trying to teach them to think about their actions because there are always consequences...this is his. Of course Shaun only sees it as punishment and just cries for the 5 minutes that I had him 'mopping' the floor. I am hoping that this will at least make him start to pay more attention in the future. There is only so much I can do and if I could change the way the door opens so that it is easier for him to stand in front of the toilet I would. Who designs a bathroom like that anyway...that is the really stupid part. On top of that, just next to the toilet, parallel to it, is the shower. There is no tub so only a sliding door. So my theory is that when the first portion of Shauns pee trajectory goes over to the shower and hits the sliding shower door and goes down to the rolling grove at the bottom and the pee goes into the shower from there. It is hard to explain but basically the pee is running off of the shower door down to the groove and going into the shower....gross. So Shaun does his mopping and I mop it again later because you know he was just moving pee around not really cleaning. Then another couple days later and the pee is back. I've had it up to my eyeballs with the freaking pee now. I had to send daddy in to manage the pee clean-up this time because I was seriously going to kill them. I knew it was both this time because there was pee on the main seat which is all Lino (to lazy to lift the damn lid) and pee on the floor so I gave Lino the wipe and Shaun the mop. Lino thought that Shaun was getting off easy so he fussed and fussed for the mop and finally I gave it to him. He wasn't happy when he saw what needed to be cleaned and he quickly turned his tune from I want to mop to "why do I have to mop?" Oh Lino, be careful what you wish for. Anyway, Mike supervised and I had to come back and supervise him...its like the big kid managing the small kid....at some point the adult has to check in to make sure they are actually doing what they are suppose to be doing. So of course it still smelled like pee and Mike said he would take care of it...he did. But when I came back again I was not convinced that the pee was gone. I went on another hunt and this time found piss in the trash can!!!! Damnit to hell...what the fuck is seriously going on. There is piss everywhere in the fucking bathroom. I can't even figure out how the hell the piss got into the trash can in the first place but after I picked it up I knew that was the true source. The fucking nasty trash can. They never even throw trash away so why do I have it in there??? I guess to catch the extra piss that the shower can't take???? What is would it be needed for? So that thing almost got tossed into the trash but living in an apartment the trash bin in in the basement and the trash can in their room was too big to go down the shoot...so I made Mike clean it! hahaha Then I went to town again with the water hose...I think I just like the fact that I can hose down the whole bathroom...it kind of makes me feel powerful in a way that I never thought possible. The moral of this whole story is that it took me a week to find the real source of the pee fumes and once I did the smell was gone thank god...well that was until the next time the little terror strikes again. Which unfortunately is about 2-3x a week. I never ever thought in my life that I would be hunting down pee...never. I am thankful that there are no carpets in this place so it is easy enough to clean up. If there was even the smallest bit of carpet here we would be in big trouble. With the heat and humidity here if they even dribbled a little pee on the carpet it would make the whole place smell for a very long time and it would be almost impossible to find the source...so for that I am thankful. But that is about it...oh and the hose...did I say how much I love this drain in the bathroom...just amazing. I can not wait to tell this story to Shaun's future wife or girlfriend because someone is going to have to worn these women that these boys are filthy nasty little creatures and if they are interested in procreating with them they need to be prepared for the nasty of the nastiest things...things you can't even imagine because that is exactly what I am dealing with now. I pray that they grow out of it because this is just gross and it makes me look bad as a mother! Like I tolerate this...believe me I do not!!!! My sister sure thinks I'm funny because as I am telling her this story she sounds like she is having a asthma attack because she is gasping for air in the middle of her laughs. I assure you this is no laughing matter...this is serious piss!!!!
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